[๐Ÿค” ์ด๊ฑฐ ํ•œ ๋งˆ๋”” ํ•ด์•ผํ•˜๋Š”๋ฐ... ์–ด๋–กํ•˜์ง€ | ์ปค๋ฆฌ์–ด๋ฆฌ

[๐Ÿค” ์ด๊ฑฐ ํ•œ ๋งˆ๋”” ํ•ด์•ผํ•˜๋Š”๋ฐ... ์–ด๋–กํ•˜์ง€? - ์–ด๋ ค์šด ์ƒํ™ฉ์—์„œ ๊ฑด์„ค์ ์œผ๋กœ ํ”ผ๋“œ๋ฐฑํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•] 1๏ธโƒฃ '๊ดœํžˆ ์˜ค์ง€๋ž–๋ถ€๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๊ฑฐ ์•„๋‹๊นŒ? ๊ทธ๋ƒฅ ์ฐธ์•„์•ผ์ง€...' 2๏ธโƒฃ "๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ๋ฌธ์ œ์ ์€ ์ด๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ณ ์น˜์„ธ์š”" ๋™๋ฃŒ๊ฐ€ ์ž˜๋ชป๋œ ํ–‰๋™์„ ํ•ด์„œ ํ•œ ๋งˆ๋”” ํ•ด์•ผ๊ฒ ๋‹ค๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ•œ ๋‹น์‹ , ์ด ์ƒํ™ฉ์—์„œ ์œ„์˜ ๋‘ ๊ฐ€์ง€ ํ–‰๋™์€ ๋ชจ๋‘ ๋‚˜์œ ์„ ํƒ์ง€์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ข‹์€ ๊ฒŒ ์ข‹์€ ๊ฑฐ๋ผ๊ณ  ๋„˜์–ด๊ฐ€๋‹ค๊ฐ€ '์ ˆ์ถฉ๊ณผ ํƒ€ํ˜‘'์˜ ํ•จ์ •์— ๋น ์ ธ๋ฒ„๋ฆฌ๊ฑฐ๋‚˜, ๋ฌด๋ก€ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ์ง€์ ํ•ด์„œ ๋ถˆํ•„์š”ํ•œ ๊ฐˆ๋“ฑ์„ ์ผ์œผํ‚ฌ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์œผ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ์š”. ๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋ฉด ์ด ์–ด๋ ค์šด ์ƒํ™ฉ์„ ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ํšจ๊ณผ์ ์œผ๋กœ ํ—ค์ณ๋‚˜๊ฐˆ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์„๊นŒ์š”? ์ด ์•„ํ‹ฐํด์—์„œ๋Š” NVC (Nonviolent Communication, ๋น„ํญ๋ ฅ๋Œ€ํ™”)๋ฅผ ๊ธฐ๋ฐ˜์œผ๋กœ ๊ฑด์„ค์ ์œผ๋กœ ํ”ผ๋“œ๋ฐฑํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ์†Œ๊ฐœํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. โ€œWhen [observation], I feel [emotion] because Iโ€™m needing some [universal needs]. Would you be able to [request]?โ€ ์–ธ๋œป ๋ณด๊ธฐ์— ์‰ฌ์›Œ๋ณด์ด์ฃ ? ๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‚˜ ๊ฐ ๋นˆ์นธ์˜ ์ •ํ™•ํ•œ ์ •์˜์™€ ํ˜ผ๋™ํ•˜๊ธฐ ์‰ฌ์šด ๊ฐœ๋…์„ ์•Œ๊ณ  ๋‚˜๋ฉด ์ ˆ๋Œ€ ์‰ฝ์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. 1๏ธโƒฃ Observation (๊ด€์ฐฐ) vs Evaluation (ํŒ๋‹จ) '๊ด€์ฐฐ'์€ 'ํŒ๋‹จ'๊ณผ ์ฐฉ๊ฐํ•˜๊ธฐ ์‰ฝ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. '๊ด€์ฐฐ'์€ ๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๋ณธ ๊ฒƒ, ๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๋“ค์€ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ ๋ฌด์˜์‹์€ ์‚ฌ๊ฑด์— ์˜๋ฏธ๋ฅผ ๋ถ€์—ฌํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์‚ฌ๊ฑด์— ์˜๋ฏธ๊ฐ€ ๋”ํ•ด์ง€๋ฉด 'ํŒ๋‹จ'์ด ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๊ด€์ฐฐ์€ ๊ตฌ์ฒด์ , ๊ฐ๊ด€์ ์ด๊ณ  ํŒ๋‹จ์€ ์ถ”์ƒ์ , ์ฃผ๊ด€์ ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋™์šด๋‹˜์ด ์ €๋ฅผ ๋ฌด์‹œํ–ˆ์„ ๋•Œ (ํŒ๋‹จ) / ๋™์šด๋‹˜๊ป˜ ๋ฉ”์ผ ๋‘ ํ†ต ๋ณด๋ƒˆ์ง€๋งŒ ๋‹ต์žฅ์„ ๋ชป ๋ฐ›์•˜์„ ๋•Œ (๊ด€์ฐฐ) 2๏ธโƒฃ Emotion (๊ฐ์ •) vs Thought (์ƒ๊ฐ) '์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋Š๋ผ๊ธฐ์—'์™€ '์ œ๊ฐ€ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๊ธฐ์—'๋ฅผ ํ—ท๊ฐˆ๋ ค์„œ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒฝ์šฐ๊ฐ€ ๋งŽ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. '์ œ๊ฐ€ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๊ธฐ์—~' ๋กœ ๋Œ€์ฒด๊ฐ€ ๊ฐ€๋Šฅํ•˜๋ฉด ๊ฐ์ •์ด ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ผ ์ƒ๊ฐ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. "์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋Š๋ผ๊ธฐ์— ๋™์šด๋‹˜์€ ์ด๊ฑธ ์ง„์ง€ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋ฐ›์•„๋“ค์ด์ง€ ์•Š์•„์š”"๋Š” ์‚ฌ์‹ค '์ƒ๊ฐ'์ด๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฑฐ์ฃ . 3๏ธโƒฃ Universal Needs (๋ณดํŽธ์  ์š•๊ตฌ) vs Strategies (์ „๋žต) ์ „๋žต์€ ์š•๊ตฌ๋ฅผ ๋งŒ์กฑ์‹œํ‚ค๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•œ ๊ตฌ์ฒด์  ํ–‰๋™์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ตฌ์ฒด์  ํ–‰๋™์„ ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐํ•˜๊ธฐ ์ „์— ๊ทธ ๋ฐ‘์— ์ˆจ๊ฒจ์ง„ ๋ณดํŽธ์  ์š•๊ตฌ๋ฅผ ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐํ•ด์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์˜ˆ๋ฅผ ๋“ค์–ด "๋ฉ”์ผ ์ฐธ์กฐ์— ์ถ”๊ฐ€ํ•  ํ•„์š”๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค"๋Š” ์ „๋žต, ๋ณดํŽธ์  ์š•๊ตฌ๋Š” "ํˆฌ๋ช…์„ฑ์ด ํ•„์š”ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค"๊ฐ€ ๋˜๊ฒ ์ฃ . 4๏ธโƒฃ Request (์š”์ฒญ) vs Demand (์š”๊ตฌ) ์š”์ฒญ์€ ์„œ๋กœ์˜ ๋‹ˆ์ฆˆ๋ฅผ ๋งŒ์กฑํ•˜๋Š” win-win ์ „๋žต, ์š”๊ตฌ๋Š” ํ•œ ์ชฝ์˜ ๋‹ˆ์ฆˆ๋งŒ ๋งŒ์กฑํ•˜๋Š” win-lose ์ „๋žต์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ข‹์€ ์š”์ฒญ์„ ์œ„ํ•ด ์•„๋ž˜ ์„ธ ๊ฐ€์ง€๊ฐ€ ํ•„์š”ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. 1) ์ƒ๋Œ€์—๊ฒŒ ๊ตฌ์ฒด์ ์ธ ํ–‰๋™์„ ์š”์ฒญ 2) ๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ์›ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ผ ๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ์›ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐ 3) ์ƒ๋Œ€ ๋‹ˆ์ฆˆ ํŒŒ์•…์„ ์œ„ํ•ด ์—ด๋ฆฐ ํƒœ๋„๋กœ ํ˜ธ๊ธฐ์‹ฌ ๊ฐ–๊ธฐ 1~4๋ฅผ ์ข…ํ•ฉํ•˜๋ฉด ์ด๋Ÿฐ ํ”ผ๋“œ๋ฐฑ์ด ๋˜๊ฒ ์ฃ  โ€œYou arrived 10 minutes late to the last three team meetings. I am frustrated because, as a team, we have a need for efficiency. Please, could you help me understand whatโ€™s happening?โ€ ํ›Œ๋ฅญํ•œ ์ปค๋ฎค๋‹ˆ์ผ€์ด์…˜์€ '๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋Š”๊ฐ€'๋ณด๋‹ค '์ƒ๋Œ€๋ฐฉ์—๊ฒŒ ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ๋“ค๋ฆฌ๋Š”๊ฐ€'๊ฐ€ ํ•ต์‹ฌ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์ƒ๋Œ€๋ฐฉ์„ 100% ์ดํ•ดํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์—†๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ๋งค๋ฒˆ ์„ฑ๊ณต์ ์ธ ์ปค๋ฎค๋‹ˆ์ผ€์ด์…˜์„ ํ•  ์ˆ˜๋Š” ์—†์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๋ž˜๋„ ๊พธ์ค€ํžˆ ์—ฐ์Šตํ• ์ˆ˜๋ก ์‹คํŒจ ํ™•๋ฅ ์ด ์กฐ๊ธˆ์”ฉ ๋‚ฎ์•„์ง€๋Š” ๊ฑธ ๋Š๋‚๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋ณธ๋ฌธ์— ๋” ์ž์„ธํ•œ ๋‚ด์šฉ์ด ์žˆ์œผ๋‹ˆ ํ•œ ๋งˆ๋”” ํ•˜๊ธฐ ์ „์— ํ•œ ๋ฒˆ ์ฝ์–ด๋ณด์„ธ์š”!

How to Deliver Constructive Feedback in Difficult Situations

Medium

2021๋…„ 2์›” 7์ผ ์˜คํ›„ 12:08

๋Œ“๊ธ€ 13

์ฃผ๊ฐ„ ์ธ๊ธฐ TOP 10

์ง€๋‚œ์ฃผ ์ปค๋ฆฌ์–ด๋ฆฌ์—์„œ ์ธ๊ธฐ ์žˆ๋˜ ๊ฒŒ์‹œ๋ฌผ์ด์—์š”!

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